Remembering Grandpa

Our grandfather has finally passed on yesterday.  He walked this earth for over 90 blessed years.  He left a tremendous legacy and tons of inspiration for me as a writer.  In fact, I dedicated my first book of poetry, Liquid Lunch,  to him.  The photo, pictured left, was the inspiration behind the book.  I love the deliberate stare of young Tom, and the look of anticipation before his first cold sip of beer.  I often wonder what they did later when they got off duty.  See, my imagination goes wild!

What can I say, he contributed so much to the man I am today.  He taught me that a man should always be a man and take care of his family.  He didn't say provide because that's left up to the Lord.  He taught me how to tie and fix a neck tie.  He taught me how to rake, mow, chop, lift, clean fish,etc.  Yeah, he taught me just about everything.  I take pride in that because he is the man who also taught my father.  This causes confusion among my aunts, who sometime think of me as their younger brother instead of nephew.  However, I was Tom's "grandboy," and proud of it.  I thank God for his life. 

I got to see him, last week when we visited him in the hospital.  When my wife and I were leaving, we kissed him and told him goodbye.  He could barely speak with all the tubes and his difficulty breathing, but I saw his mouth move.  He said, "ok."  Ok, grandpa.  I'll see you in Glory.  Thank you for being a great grandfather and a great man. I love you.

Your grandboy,
Stevie

Happy 90th Birthday to Grandpa Bess!

Happy 90th Birthday to my grandfather (seated left).  He definitely has a lot to do with who I am today.  God bless him. 
(Pictured left to right:  Grandpa -Tom Best, Stephen Bess, Great Aunt - Josephine)

Photograph by:  Mrs. Bess

Grandmama for Obama

I'm getting ready to watch the Palin and Biden debate this evening. This is a recent picture of my maternal grandmother. Can't you tell -- just look at that round face and nose. That's my mother and cousin in the background. Anyway, my grandmother loves herself some Barack Obama. I asked her if she was going to get out and vote and she just replied, "Yea!...Obama!" I'll take that as a yes. *smile*

The Road Home

Soon, my wife and I will be taking a little trip south to see grandfather Bess. He's 89 years old and counting. I always enjoy my visits to North Carolina no matter how short and routine it may be. When I get home, we usually drive grandpa around town to see family and friends. He doesn't see them as often as he would like because most of them, including grandpa, no longer drive.

Then, we'll go over to Mr. Little's fish market. I went to high school with Mr. Little's son, David. Mr. Little gives me updates on how things are going with David and I'll listen and smile even though David and I were never really close in school. My grandfather will buy me a coke and we'll sit and talk to Mr. Little until they are both satisfied.

Then, we'll go back to the house. My aunts will have dinner ready and we'll talk until it's time for grandpa to go to bed. That's usually around 8 p.m.  On Sunday morning, I'll wake up and fix him some breakfast; He'll clean his plate and give me a compliment by telling me that I cook as good as a woman.  I'll laugh and tell him thanks for the compliment. 

Soon, I'll announce that it's time for us to head back to Maryland.  At this point, grandpa will estimate our time of arrival and wish us well.  Yes, it's all pretty short and routine, but I love it.  It's always good to visit home. 

Photo:  Bridge on Interstate 395 South.  By S. Bess

The Giving Gift

Whoever renders service to many puts himself in line for greatness -- great wealth, great return, great satisfaction, great reputation, and great joy.
Author: Jim Rohn

Wow! This weekend was really great. I must say that I have really been enjoying my weekends lately. I started off on Friday evening with a Fashion Show and music at Zanzibar on the Waterfront. It's a club here in DC. It was really fantastic. The theme was South Africa and it featured the style, dance and music of South Africa. It was great! The South African community represented well. There were people of all age groups. I also helped to host the event. It's been a very long time since I've been on stage since my radio days, but I think that I did a great job. I was so nervous that I would not represent the pageant well. Overall, I practiced a little and executed well.

Saturday was a family event. My mother's church had a picnic. My mother was proud that a great deal of her family showed up. Shew!!! She only had to mention that there will be free food! We were there! It was nice to see my older brother and nephew. We ate well and laughed the afternoon away. Afterwards, I went to visit my grandmother. We can really take our older loved ones for granted at times. We talked to my grandmother for about an hour. She talked a lot about her mother, grandmother, father and her childhood. It was like listening to a griot or exciting storyteller. She told me and my friend things that I've never known. I was especially fascinated about the information about my great-great grandmother. She showed us pictures and talked about her as a person. The moment was golden. Anyway, I could go on and on so I'll just end it here. I'll just say that it is very important to extend yourself to your family, loved ones, and people in your community. Giving is an investment in love; the return is more than you could ever imagine. Peace~

Early Times Spent

I was in North Carolina this past weekend visiting my grandfather. He lives in Williamston. Williamston is located in Eastern North Carolina along the Roanoke River. My family has deep roots in that part of the state and Martin County specifically that goes back 150 years. My grandfather is a great source of information and a direct link to the past. He is a joy to talk to because he has become quite the conversationalist at 86 years of age. He arbitrarily talks about his youth and usually the happiest times of his life. He doesn't talk about past loves, but of past cars. I don't care what question I asked he would always mention the car that he owned around that time. I asked him about the time that he asked for my grandmothers hand in marriage in 1945. He responded with, "I had a green 1938 Chevrolet." He did mention that there was another girl that wanted him to marry her, but he wanted my grandmother especially. He also talked about the best car that he'd ever owned. It was a 1966 Dodge. He said that he paid for it in 8 easy payments from a private owner. I think that he talks about cars so much because he wants to drive again. He hasn't been able to drive since he took a fall and broke his hip. This is very difficult for a man that has spent most of his life behind the wheel. It meant freedom to him and most importantly mobility.
Eventually, he sent me on a mission for his favorite night cap, Early Times Kentucky Whiskey. I was given specific instructions on how to smuggle it in past my aunt and into his bedroom. I know...I was contributing to the dilequency of an elder, but I couldn't say no. Anyway, the mission was succesful and my aunt was none the wiser. He thanked me with a nod of his head and we continued to talk and watch television. I ended that weekend with the usual breakfast that I prepared for him before I hit the road. I made eggs and some good ol' North Carolina sausage with a side of Piggly Wiggly's Butter-Me-Not biscuits with peach preserves. He had his additional apples sauce and glass of milk to wash it all down. He finished his breakfast and said, "Thank ya, boy....that was good." I smiled and told him that I was glad that he enjoyed it. We talked a little after breakfast and he asked me his usual question about how long it would take me to get back to DC. I told him 4 hours and then he talked about the time he made it in 3 1/2 hours back in '67 along with his cousin, H Tom. Anyway, I eventually gathered my things and said my goodbyes. The road back was peaceful and reflective. I thought of my grandfather and how important he is to me. I also thought about how much he has influenced me as a man. I feel like I owe him so much; especially since I never gave him back the change from the bottle of Early Times Whiskey that I picked up for him.

Monday Morning Thoughts

"In the world through which I travel, I am endlessly creating myself." (Frantz Fanon in Black Skin, White Masks, 1952)

Good morning!
Fanon said something very interesting. The thought of "endlessly creating myself." Sometimes when I pray I ask God to help me become a better me. I don't measure my aspirations with other people because I know that we are all different and we possess our own unique qualities. This weekend I was discussing with a friend the uniqueness of different people and their personalities. My grandmother, Eunice, would say that I was very "peculiar. " :) I sort of giggle when I think of her words because she knew me so well. She meant that I was unpredictable and that I could not be easily defined based on outward apperarance. No, I do not think that I am special. There are many like me. You really don't get to know who we are until you spend some time with us, touch us, and began to absorb us as a person. In those intimate moments you will see many sides of my personality because I am not just one type. I don't think that I require medication or anything to regulate this "disorder" because it is what makes me unique. Remember, It is our "flaws" that sometimes make us so beautiful. Peace~