Monday, March 06, 2006

This Is What $1.25 Gets Ya!

Good morning,
I just want to share my morning commute. Every morning I race out of the house trying to catch the 7:05 am metro bus headed to subway station. This morning I had to jog in order to catch it. Anyway, I usually get on the bus and search for a seat as I carefully screen the faces of the passengers. It's a habit. This morning was no different. There were the same people on the bus of diverse backgrounds. It's always mostly women. Roughly, its made up of 50% African/Black, 30% Latino, 10% Asian, 5% Caucasian, the rest are men. Well, this morning I noticed a rather peculiar man on the bus. I say peculiar because he sort of sat there with a blank stare. I'm thinking that I don't need to sit near him. As I looked at him he reminded me of the boxer "Butter Bean" so that's what I'll call him. He was your average big, fat, bald white guy. He was surrounded by hefty bags on his left and right. Actually, he had two on his side and one carrying bag sitting on the floor between his legs. Again, I felt that there was something strange about him and I didn't want to be near him when he "did his thing." I didn't know what that "thing" would be but I had a funny feeling. The bus pulled up to the next stop and more people boarded the bus. Seats filled quickly, but Butter Bean still had his hefty bags sitting in a potential seat. This is when Butter Bean starts to do his "thing." A woman walks up to the seat and says politely, 'excuse me can you move your bag so that I can sit down?' Butter Bean keeps his eyes forward and does not reply. The woman ask him again and he remained silent. All of a sudden this African woman sitting directly across from him yells, 'move your bag and let the lady sit!' Butter Bean instantly removes his bag and although silent he begins to shake. Meanwhile, I am giggling because it took this African mother to make Butter Bean do the right thing. Okay, that's over....no it's not! All of a sudden I hear someone shout, 'this is what $1.25 gets ya!' It was Butter Bean and he was red and upset. I looked and I giggled some more with the woman that was sitting beside me. He said it over and over, 'this is what $1.25 get ya!' The women that were surrounding him all began to look at each other with a perplexed look. Some of them were giggling as well.

Things seemed to calm down a bit until the bus pulled up to another stop. Passengers boarded and by this time Butter Bean sat again staring straight ahead. Another woman walked up to him and asked if that was his bag sitting on the right of him. 'No!' The woman smiled and said, 'excuse me?' 'This is what $1.25 gets ya!' Butter Bean shouted as his hands began to shake. I giggled again. 'Move that bag and let that woman sit!' scolded the African mother. Butter Bean moved the bags, but by then the woman wanted to stand. 'Go on and sit down honey,' the African mother said. 'No thank you I'm more comfortable standing,' the woman responded. Anyway, Butter Bean still removed the second bag and mumbled some things as his skin descended from it's beet like appearance. The bus finally made it to the subway station. Everyone scrambled to get off while Butter Bean gathered his hefty bags. I watched him get off the bus and he started his walk down the walkway. He went up to a trash can and threw the two hefty bags into a trash can. He took his garbage on the bus????

27 comments:

MJW said...

I don't care what anyone in any other city says: Washington, D.C. has the most entertaining crazy people in America. :-)

What bus line was this?

Stephen A. Bess said...

This was the Z6. I agree. You see men and women on the bus and train that will either delight you or depress you for the rest of the day. Butter Bean was a delightful man. :)

Anonymous said...

Thank you for making me smile today! I needed a entertaining story. Good instincts to not sit by him though!

Bougie Black Boy said...

that is one of your best posts... i think i always say that though. :)

This made my morning... I gotta love Public Transportation. An experience each time.

Stephen A. Bess said...

faith-
yes, you learn from experience. I try to avoid altercations at all cost. I would've intervened only if the big guy got huffy with the older woman that was ordering him.
I'm happy that I could make you smile. :)

SEJ-
I know that it gets more interesting in NY. :)I'm glad that you liked the post.

Anonymous said...

You know, you are just the sweet gentleman that would interfer "if the big guy got huffy with the older woman that was ordering him." That is a wonderful thing too! I mean that as a compliment! And as far as she goes, I say, you go girl! I am so glad she put the big guy in his place, not once, but twice!

Mrs A. said...

lawd help us!! i get scared when stuff like that happens...i know i wouldnt have had the nerve to say anything to Butter Bean. he could've bopped me on the head with one of his damn bags and then what!?!?

Stephen A. Bess said...

Faith,
Thanks for the compliment. Yeah, that lady didn't play. She was not even mean just firm. :)

Miss A-
Haa haa! He'd bop you in the head and say, "this is what $1.25 gets ya!" :)

Bougie Black Boy said...

about the fact that he put garbage on the bus is also hilarious.

one man's trash is another man's treasure?

Nakeel said...

That was real drama.. A guy with his garbage in the bus loool...

U had a nice laughter

Uaridi said...

And what was he expecting for $1.25?

Stephen A. Bess said...

SEJ-
I'm afraid to know what was in that bag. :)

Nakeel-
I cracked up. People are so interesting.

Uaridi-
Haa haa! I guess that he was expecting luxury accommodations. :)

Anonymous said...

Very funny :) Interestingly funny :)
I hate to be the party-......,
However, I bet you if it was a woman, especially not anglo, someone would have paid close attention to the rubbish, the owner and its contents post-disposal. Our society is so twisted, if you are a certain size, shape, color etc you may, or may not be held responsible for your actions at all. Why don't we think that could be a bomb..?? Because the man does not look like a terrorist? How does a terrorist look like? How does Timothy McVeigh look like??

Stephen A. Bess said...

Tryphina-

I didn't consider whether he would want to harm people, but that is a good point in these days and times. Thank you my conscious sista.

Poi-
Yes, you see all types on public trans. That reminds me of Curtis Mayfield's song, Stare and Stare. He talks about the characters that one sees on public transportation. Good to see you. :)

Stephen A. Bess said...

Haa haa! I like Monk. I didn't get too close to him, but he didn't seem to smell. It was 38 degrees outside, but he had on a T-shirt and slacks. He didn't seem retarded, but definitely a little Bipolar. :)

Stacy-Deanne said...

Man that gave me chills. There are some crazy folks in this world. And most of them ride the bus, LOL! Butter Bean strikes me as the kind to blow up everyone at his job. I'd rather sat on a man's lap than to sit NEXT to him. He probably stunk like nobody's business too. I mean, minus the garbage, LOL!

Stephen A. Bess said...

stacy-deanne,
your funny! lol. You know what's worse though...Grey Hound. There are some freaks on there. It's been years since I've been on one, but I'm sure that things are not better.

Spin_Doc1 said...

This post reminded me of why I love my car.

Pilgrimage to Self said...

Hi Stephen Bess,
Just stumbled on your blog and this entry was very funny. Makes me glad I have left PT behind! Hope you don't mind if I link you?

PTS

Mrs A. said...

waiting...waiting...waiting

Stephen A. Bess said...

spin doc-
I still love public transportation because I get to read on my way to work. Thanks for stopping in. :)

Pilgrimage-
Hello! Thanks for stopping in and thanks for linking me.

Miss A-
Huh??? :)

A.u.n.t. Jackie said...

Ay Dios Mio! Stories like this are what I miss and don't miss about being a commuter in San Francisco. LA can almost allow us to forget how crazy people really are, because we don't have to share space with people in our cars!

straight colorful characters!

Stephen A. Bess said...

I'll have to make it out to the west side one day. I think that it will be interesting.

kathi said...

Too wierd! I wanna know what was in those bags.

Stephen A. Bess said...

Hello Kathi,
Welcome. I'm afraid to know what was in those bags. This guy looked too weird. I haven't seen him on the bus before or after that day? He really didn't want to share his space though. Strange fella.

NML/Natalie said...

Tell that mofo, that for $1.25, you can't even approach the bus in London, never mind sit on it. The cheek of him. He puts the bag on the seats because he's an attention seeker. He likes to be called on his behaviour.

Stephen A. Bess said...

Haaa haaa!! I know that you would've given him all the 'attention' that he needed if he was in your space. :)

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